Tick tock

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I’ve spent a lot of time talking and thinking about the future this weekend rather than enjoying the moment and being present.

Here’s to that:

Presently Living in the future,
5 feet in front of all the others,
– ‘better here, than all the way back there’ I cry, to no one in particular.
Past clock towers and shop fronts
whiz by on the breeze
whose speed picked up the minute I stepped out of my present box.

Sunday 7th February 2016

Image from here.

© LE Purse


Not fighting the fight

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Sometimes I feel as though I am turning in circles and not getting anywhere with things and people. This is all about that:

Round and round
they go
boxing gloves on
arms raised
but no intention of hitting out
of hurting each other

A dance on the tiptoes ensues:

Round and round
dizzy just thinking
of the ducking
and bobbing
the light feet
and the graceful arms

Round and  round

I go with them
until, at last, I am broken
and ready
to pirouette into the fading light.

2nd February 2016

© LE Purse


A wonderful Monday…

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…is not a sentence I often use, but today was different.

Today was a corner turned, a fresh look, another step on working on my well-being. I started my day with Yoga with Adriene to day 9 of yoga camp which paved the way for an epic way to be bold in my day (achieved no less than 4 times today in day affecting ways). This was followed by a driving lesson manoeuvring around cars, corners, and clutches and then a day of being assertive with my workload and the people relating to it. To book end my day I attended a spiritual book group where we read and discuss books of a spiritual nature at Tree of Life. This is where my inspiration came from for today’s poem.

Hope you enjoy:

A cocktail of hope and faith

Here’s how the stars shine
in her eyes,
Here’s how the light rested
upon her shoulder,
Here’s how the numbers
sparked her intrigue,
Here’s how the energy
danced from palm to palm,
Here’s how the water
ran down her cheeks,
Here’s how her limbs
connected with her breath with her mind,
Here’s how
she’s able to open her eyes.

© LE Purse
1st February 2016


The False Poem

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Sometimes, every few years, I write a poem that sounds like 100s of other poems I’ve read or written before. I don’t know if that makes me a bad poet or a truthful one. I know people in the literary world (I’m not sure exactly who they are) sometimes say authors take a huge chunk of inspiration and ideas from other authors and poets but I’ve never heard anyone say that about a modern day poet. Nonetheless the one I scribbled a few moments ago is just that. I was, I have to say inspired by the glimpse of the moon as I closed the blinds at work today.

Hope you enjoy:

A sliver, A slice
Just a sliver,
Just a slice
of a moon
staring
out of the sky
As the Sun
slips away
saying Her final
goodbye
Thou art so slim
and slight
already brightly
shining as
though it were night
The outline
of Your wonder
amazes me still
despite my age
and loss of innocence.
Shine, shine, shine
Your
silver gleam
until the Sun rears Her head
in the new light of morn.

©LE Purse
12th January 2016

Image from this wonderful place with a very original lunar inspired poem.


Scrabbling with Acceptance

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Today’s been a long day where I’ve contemplated many a thing – I was going to list them all, but honestly it’s ludicrously long.

So, here’s a poem I wrote around acceptance of who and where I am right now, and having to patience to hold back.

Hope you enjoy:

Scrabble
I line up my tiles
eager to place the hastily thought up letters words into a coherent order
As I wait for you to think pause muse over your next move
I turn each tile
around
and
around
‘tween my finger and thumb
Still I wait
A w h o l e  s i x t y  s e c o n d s pass
as I remind myself of my high point scoring addition
I scurry the pieces into my palm, curling my fingers round them
I turn them into the beads in my maraca hand.
Your eyes don’t even flicker.
One by one, I brand myself with each individual letter
Leaving a medley of alphabet soup splashed onto my wrist
Fingertips itching
As you finally set your sights on a row
You place ‘L’ ‘U’ with ‘C’ being followed by ‘K’
whisking away any chance the letters I grip will form the word I want.

©LE Purse
11th January 2016

Image from here.


Belated Dedication

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It’s 2016. The start of a new year full of a new you, new things, new promises to yourself and others, new adventures, new grief, new friends, new challenges, new fun…

This year I’ve made no resolutions out loud, I’ve not written anything down, or told anyone about the things I’m hoping I’m strong enough to stick to. Yet.

I’m going to do it in a moment. My resolutions are a bit different this year, they’re things I started in the last 6 months of the year without the pressure of ‘self improving” the second the clock strikes 12 on the 1st January. And because of this I’ve stuck to them, as much as I  could, so I’m going to keep getting better at these things. Anyway, see below (I promise I’ll get to the poem eventually).

Here goes nothing:

1. Background
I tried last year to follow through with the things I said out loud to make sure my word could be trusted – from taking out the recycling and doing things around the house to visiting friends and family. I tried really hard, and I have to say I’ve noticed a difference, but I’ve still not managed to follow through on all of my “promises”.
Resolution
To continue improving on putting my words into actions so that my words mean something.

2. Background
Similar to the above, I acquired a nickname at the beginning of last  year, affectionately (that’s what I’m going with anyway) given to me by Matt. My nick name is ” half a job”. This is because I often start one job and move onto the next without finishing the first. This can sometimes happen with 3 or 4 tasks. Annoying right? I definitely made progress on this last year and it’s something I want to keep getting better at.
Resolution
To continue trying, and succeeding, to finish one job before moving onto the next.

3. Background
I need to make more of an effort to ensure I have a good work/life balance so I can meet more people. I used to be known as a social butterfly until I moved to Brighton and had to start making new friends as an adult. For those that have been there you’ll understand that a new place with a partner can be tough – you rely on them to be your everything because it seems like the less scary and less likely to get hurt route than actually approaching people and nurturing a friendship. So this is what my final resolution is about.

Resolution
To reestablish myself in Brighton and regain the crown of “queen of the social butterflies” (and yes I did give myself that title!).

So, there you have it. My 3 resolutions for 2016.

I’m going to stop rambling and share the poem I came here to share. It does link to my final resolution of friends but it is about the precious friends I’ve known since I was 11.

Hope you enjoy:

17 years and counting
No matter what length or colour
of the ribbons that flow from you
to the rooms and fields where we grew,
I will still lace mine with yours.

No matter how fast the petals may fall
from your flowery crown
or where they may land,
I will still be one step behind you collecting them all.

No matter how deep you may wade
into the river or how wet you may get,
I will be there to keep you warm.

No matter the stones you may stumble
on along your road,
I will be there with an outstretched arm and an open palm.

No matter how high they’re dropped or where our pins land,
I will always be right here.

©LE Purse
10th October 2015


Shedding Skin

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The past few weeks and months have been a time of change and moving forward for me. And, like a lot of ‘learning experiences’ it has been one hell of a hike. Everything seemed to be building up to something, with the pile getting taller and wider each day, emotional baggage spilling out from every angle. I haven’t been alone in this, I’ve been going through it with someone, but sometimes that doesn’t make it any easier, sometimes it just makes it harder on both of you.

The something it was building up to was last week; a week so terrible I don’t have the strength to talk about it just yet for fear of reliving the anxieties it brought. The  mountain’s growth has meant that those I love have been kept on the edges of my life despite messages of love and simple conversation. So, this poem is dedicated to you all of those people who’ve reached out in friendship and love over the past 3 months and have been disappointed or upset in my lack of a response. If you’ve tried to call, text or email me and I’ve not got back to you for days or even at all please don’t take it personally; my life has been on a chaotic rise with no end in sight, until now.

Hopefully you’ll be pleased to know that this mountain’s emergence over the weeks and months of this year, that culminated in something that only dynamite can tackle, is slowly subsiding, crumbling into piles of rocks and soil as the sun sets on last week. Thank you to everyone who has shown patience and care, especially those who have allowed me to get in touch on my own terms and just listened.

Hope you enjoy this short I wrote last night to mark the start of a new week and the dismantling of a mountain:

Shedding Skin
Unzip
and step outside
                              of your mind
Look at it from a new view
and make sure you handle with care.
Rest.
Breathe.
Smile.
Shed the layer of grime
that emotional exhaustion leaves behind;
Shed and begin anew.

© LE Purse
18th October 2015


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